Babes LaLa (@laureneandrew) and Sophie Lee (@sophirelee) for our Eliminate Girl Hate campaign
Whether it’s a snide remark in the street, a sh*tty comment on your latest selfie or perhaps worse, things being said behind you’re back, we’ve ALL experienced some form of girl hate.
International Women’s Day is just around the corner and in line with our latest campaign, we asked a few of our own EGO gals at HQ about their experiences with girl hate and how they dealt with them.
Grace experienced girl hate in the workplace at a previous job. She says:
‘I’m not a particularly sensitive person but in the past, I’ve felt that people have done things both online and offline that have affected me mentally. I think one of the worst types of behaviour is passive aggression because it’s an indirect expression of hostility. I’ve been subject to indiscreet insults, manipulation of situations and people, deliberate failure of cooperation and even just being ignored and excluded. There’s something more calculating about someone being passive because they are going out of their way to make you feel small and unworthy. It gets into your head and makes you think you’re not good enough.
Negative energy breeds negativity and passiveness is just as bad as being around someone who screams in your face. I would actually rather the latter because at least then you can clear the air and stop yourself from thinking you’re being paranoid.
I actually handed my notice in (not just because of this one person but her behaviour played a part in my decision to leave) and after everything, I wasn’t upset about what had happened but actually frustrated that I let it affect me so much. This girl upset a lot of people who have continued to be silently and passively bullied. I have no hard feelings but I just don’t stand for that kind of behaviour. I’ve always lived my life as an all or nothing/everything happens for a reason/life is too short kinda gal (hence why I’m a secret wild child) . I suffered really badly from anxiety when I lived in London so I vowed never to let anyone make me feel that way again.’
Pretty sh*tty right? You always expect adults to grow up and not be as b*tchy but actually, they’re sometimes worse. From a young age though, girls can be mean and nasty, not realising the impact that their actions and words can have on others. Georgia recalls how girls at school bullied her:
‘I got told daily I was too skinny, people constantly called me names because of my weight. I used to eat bars of chocolate for lunch every day to try and ‘fatten up’ but as I grew up, I realised that’s just the way my body works and now, I’m grateful for my fast metabolism!
Girls in school used to tweet each other about me, saying they wanted me dead and that they wish I’d just leave school, which I eventually did at 16. At the time, I didn’t deal with it very well and I lashed out – always getting in trouble with the teachers and acting up. It’s made me realise the effects of people’s words and actions and how important it is just to be kind to everyone. Bitchiness, fakeness and 2-facedness are such unattractive traits and I’m now very careful with how I choose my friends and who I choose to spend my time with.’
It’s scary how the words of one person can have such an impact. And so silly that girls are wasting so much time hating on other girls! We’ve got it hard enough as it huns, we need to be supporting each other and lifting each other up, not bringing each other down. So take a moment before you say something that might hurt someone and if you see it happening, stand up to it! Check yourself. We girls deserve better and we need to be setting an example for how we want others to treat us.
We’re stronger, sassier and more badass when we stand together. As part of the #eGOGIRL movement, let’s Eliminate Girl Hate.
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